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16 July 2006 at 07:49

trying to help

A woman I know is very sick, and hotboy has generously offered to help me meditate for her. Every hour that I meditate, he'll match with 2 hours of his own meditations.

On Friday I started the meditation program. I thought I'd start with something easy, just 15 minutes lying flat and thinking well of her.

Well, it wasn't that easy. I was trying to still the inner chatter, when I noticed that my upper arms wanted to punch someone's face in, and my fingers wanted to strangle somebody. Well, I breathed that one away, but then I noticed the forearms wanted to rip someone's throat out. By the time I dissolved that thought, it was time for some mental blogging, visualising a beer, etc.

Over the entire 15 minutes, I probably managed 3 whole breaths where I thought of nothing else. Pathetic! I'll have to ask hotboy for advice. I wonder if he recommends masturbating before meditation, or after.

Today I had slightly more success. I lay in a hot bath (that may be cheating), and probably managed about 5 whole breaths of relative emptiness. I just hope my sick friend is getting more from hotboy than from me.

Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Zeig! Your future lifetimes spent as a fruitfly in one of the most horrible toilets in the galaxy might be getting recinded! If I were you, I'd find some soothing mumbo jumbo to say to myself. But concentrating on the breath is recommended by everyone else. If you try to visualise the josephine (or your mother) that might keep you more alert. Initially, I think the gap between thoughts is where ra bliss will be eventually. Just stick with any method until you feel some unusual mental state. As soon as you recognise it, it'll probably disappear, but that's what you want to re-inforce. Using a mantra means nice feelings will attach to the mantra. When you repeat it later, then nice feelings will arise. I used susquehanna for nine years and still love the sound. Whatever you use, you have to stick with it. You will have access to ra bliss if you do this. If you don't, you won't.Find out where the hit is. This isn't Calvinism. It's punishment and reward. Go for the sweeties! Hotboy  


Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Heil! I suppose before or after you do it, you should say your dedicating the merit to the woman's good mental health, or something like that. Doing nothing won't help anyone. Hotboy  


Blogger yep, it's me.... said...

........ interesting  


Blogger Lee Ann said...

That is very interesting. Rob, I am very impressed that you have worked at this and spent time recollecting.
I am sure it is working more than you think!
You have a good heart.


Blogger WDKY said...

Hmmmm. I suspect you're full of anger. Have you tried meditating?



Blogger keda said...

i told you very clearly what to do!!honestly in one ear...

it really does help to visualise something though. either about healing as a concept or your friend. even just thinking about relaxing each and every part of your body bit by bit. from the top of your head to the tips of your toes.

then as you relax think positive thoughts about your friends body and energy. (steady boy!)

i get stuck on other stuff if i try to just go with the breathing too.  


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