open text
30 May 2006 at 09:36
war reminder
I think he makes the pictures by first laying down the borders (ahem!) between colours, using string or putty. Then he applies the colours, before removing the border material. He relies on his wife to tell him which colour he's using.
He has more paintings at his site (click the pic or the source link at bottom of this post - then click on "Bilder" which is German for "Pictures").
Sources acknowledged.
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! The sources are in some foreign language so it's hard to tell if this is a wind up or not. Can't see? A painter who can't see. Interesting gimmick, if nothing else. Getting you eyes shot out has put me off joining up, I'll tell you that! Hotboy
~
onan the bavarian said...
Yes, sorry, it's not a wind-up. I suppose that's the downside of crying wolf, people assume you're always taking the P. He's an uncle of the "old family friend" variety. He's such a nice guy, though I haven't seen him for ages.
~
Lee Ann said...
Wow, that is a fascinating story. He sounds like an amazing person.
The painting is very colorful!
:)
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! Dead interesting idea painting when you're blind. I guess you imagine the shapes and colours. Beethoven was deaf, wasn't he? But that's a bit easier. Yeah, easy to be Beethoven. Piece of cake. Being a genius might help. Hotboy. Da da da da... anybody can do that!
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Zeig! What happened to your comment thing. I thought I was seeeing double. And it's not my fault this time. That was a help! Hotboy
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! Dead interesting idea painting when you're blind. I guess you imagine the shapes and colours. Beethoven was deaf, wasn't he? But that's a bit easier. Yeah, easy to be Beethoven. Piece of cake. Being a genius might help. Hotboy. Da da da da... anybody can do that!
~
keda said...
its all gone a bit squiffly here. i moved to firefox and suddenly your sidebar is underneath. is that normal? anyway, the template looks a lot better which is quite hard as i loved it before anyway. did you have your hair cut?
sorry.
what an amazing guy. i guess he must feel the paintings sculpturally. if he's feeling his way around the paper/canvas and blocking spaces its more about touch. which also begs the question why he then sticks to 2 dimensions.... wow!
i'm very interested. what an incredible bloke.
thanks babe*
~
Leesa said...
Wow, beautiful work :) Thanks!
~
26 May 2006 at 09:27
after the party
What a great party that was last night. Thanks to all who came along. Shall we all do it again another Thursday? Next week my mother's invited.
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! Looking forward to your mother next week! Yummy. I'm only doing interviews in future while standing on my head and completely sober! That might help! Probably won't. Hotboy
~
Lee Ann said...
What would be great if we could do an interview with the 3 of us and mix it as if we were all in the same room! What a difference in accents between the 3 of us!
You guys are great.
~
Lee Ann said...
I listened to the videos again. I think I understood a few more words this time.
...truths...second truth...desire..."f-word"...physical...oh me...dearie me.
then with your part... look better than last year....he was on lithium.
Still love your accents! You both are the cutest.
~
24 May 2006 at 19:37
HNT edinburgh interviews
I haven't had time to do subtitles, but the audio is pretty clear so you shouldn't have any problems. Let me know if there's a word you don't understand.
If you're not particularly interested in hearing what a couple of middle-aged Scottish underachievers have to say about life, bliss, childhood trauma and the class system, skip the videos.
Each video lasts about 2 minutes, and is available in high quality for broadband users, and low quality for dialup.
Hotboy interviewed for broadband
Hotboy interviewed for dialup
Rob interviewed for broadband
Rob interviewed for dialup
I don't usually show my face on this blog, for security purposes, and for tax reasons. So I'll probably delete this post before next week. Possibly sooner, if hotboy's publishers get wind of this.
If you missed previous HNTs, you can access all the old half baked thursday posts here.
keda said...
its so fuckin late here its actually not funny, but i had to do those both 3 times each and i've still forgotten what i wanted to say other than.....
youy boys have NO BLOODY IDEA how yummy it is for a celtic lass to watch two middle aged scotts discuss nonsense over guiness and weed and try to decifer the nonsense from the crap.
i totally agree on point number 2. and i so wnt to get more cheerful. so GO hotboy. but what about truths no. 3 & 4??? i hardly undrstood a thing of what you said dear boy. but thenm you werent lookin at the camera....
and i'm slightly wasted now so i'll try again on the moro.
love it though. GREAT hnt.
night hons*
~
lecram sinun said...
Aye... it be good. Huh? Cheers and Happy HNT!
~
Lee Ann said...
I absolutely love it! You both are sooooo adorable.
I have to say I understand you better than Hotboy. I think subtitles would be a big help. I really thought I would not need them when I saw that you had written that.
I wish I could do that for everyone. There are several people that have asked how southern I sound. Is it hard to do?
Thank you for doing this, I love both of your accents.
What is that stuff that Hotboy is smoking? *giggle*
Oh, was that a sample of the beer you guys have over there?
Love you both!
I think I will come back over and listen to this often. I want to know what you guys were saying :)
~
onan the bavarian said...
You guys don't know what this means to me. In accepting this award on behalf of hotboy and myself, I'd like to thank hotboy's partner, "Domestic Bliss," for having the good sense to leave the room and let us get on with filming the verbiage.
~
WDKY said...
Brilliant idea. And I must admit I'd quite like to be sitting smoking weed and discussing the Noble Truths right now. That's some accent Hotboy has, by the way. He sounds a bit like one of those Scots that even other Scots have trouble understanding :-)
Happy HNT!
~
Lelly said...
You hardly got a wurrrd in edgeways Rob!...but very nice to see and hear the both of youse! HHNT!
~
Suze said...
Well, was he as smacked off his tits as he sounded?
Happy HNT sweetie ;)
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Zeig! Just saw one of the videos. Even I couldn't understand a word of it! I'll have to do a sober one next time! That would help. Hotboy
~
lime said...
lol, you guys are a hoot. but hotboy barely let you get a word in edgewise! happy HNT!
~
onan the bavarian said...
I'm amazed how many of you chaps picked up that hotboy was talking about the 4 Noble Truths (I always thought he was saying Normal Truths). Are buddhists over-represented in blogland? Maybe that's another normal truth. I feel a research application coming on.
Suze - I'd rather not say.
Lelly & Lime - nowadays I think they call it being conversationally gifted.
Lee Ann - you can do interview videos with any video camera or most digital still cameras, then compress it and upload to google video or you tube or similar. I'll be happy to help if you ever do it. The hardest part is finding people who can forget the camera and just talk. Hotboy's a natural.
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! Just managed to download the second one. Dearie me! Thank God I gave up beer this morning! I could hear myself mostly on the second one. It didn't help! Hotboy p.s. just off for some root canal work. I probably deserve it!
~
said...
Not enough you talking! And even though I only understood, like, maybe an eighth of what was said, I could listen all day long. Won't one (or both!) of you record a nice long book-on-tape for me to go to sleep to?
And heh. Tartan monk's robes. Nice! HHNT!
~
said...
Oh, and if I can leave up my face pics this week, can't you leave yours up a while at least?
~
S said...
~
said...
Well I'm sooo glad I got to see it before you deleted the pics :)
Great HNT dear and thank you soooo much for all your kind words!
~B
~
zomba said...
Well I say!
How enjoyable to see both yourself and Hotboy on film. Bravo to UnHeard of Films for this production.
Many is the time I have listened to Hotboy expound on the Four Noble Truths, but, to be honest, by the time he has reached the fourth one, one tends to have forgotten what the first three were.
I am very much looking forwards to seeing him once more, and I hope to be able to film him en situ, at his hut.
MM III
~
Lil Bit said...
LOL!
In the words of HotBoy...
Oh me, oh me, oh me, oh me, oh me...
uh, WTF?
This Southern American gal didn't get nary a wurrrrrrd of that. Huh? Say what? ;)
Maybe I just need to be high. LOL
Next time, speak up Rob! I couldn't actually understand what few words you said.
HHNT and a belated HHNA! =)
~
said...
Dammit, my speaker(s) on the PC are stoopid.... I'll be back with my laptop!!
~
onan the bavarian said...
What a great party this has been. Shall we all do it again another Thursday? Next week my mother's invited.
Addict - don't blame your speakers, it's us.
Lil Bit - that's the first time anyone's accused me of being harder to understand than hotboy.
Orchid - fair point about leaving the face pics up, though your own face is more deserving.
HB - D'ya hear what Lime and Lelly and Lil Bit said? (What's with all the L's- is that Lee Ann projecting her mind-waves again?) I'm coming back in 2007, with a loud hailer and a six-pack of 1%.
MM- I'm glad you managed to find an internet caff wherever you are now.
~
said...
~
AndyT13 said...
~
Sexy Duet said...
~
Lil Bit said...
I'm an idiot.
I typed "couldn't" when I meant "could". sheesh.
And most def, another Thurs... Moms are welcome! (except mine. lol) =)
~
onan the bavarian said...
Lil - thanks for the clarification, I like version 2 of your comment better. Have a good weekend.
~
Lee Ann said...
haha....I told you that I have that special thing that I can read a person's mind on occasion. Well, I can also send thoughts to people!
::wink::
~
at 08:59
are we there yet?
I'm basically a heathen but I use freelance Taoism, which advises against all striving because everything will achieve balance anyway. This religion is just made for under-achievers like me. And once you tune in to the Tao, you notice it operating everywhere. No need for books, temples, incantations, priests, movies.
For instance, on Sunday I spent all day sitting at the PC, editing the forthcoming video of the hotboy interview, to show him in the best possible light. As a result, I ended up with an attack of the screaming neck pain, and had to take one of hotboy's mum's knockout painkillers.
You see what's happening here? Everything's balancing up. Hotboy giveth the pain, and hotboy taketh it away again. The deity moves in mysterious ways. Now the after-effects of the painkillers have made me high as a sugar-hyped teenager, so maybe the deity's trying to get me to meditate. Maybe I should surrender to it, and try a few breaths. But then the second video, the robmcj one, would never get edited in time for the next HNT. So stuff the meditation and pass the pills.
Menzies was asking me about the painkillers (Coproxamol). They have been withdrawn from the market, because people were using them to top themselves. This is the litigation culture at work again.
Last time I was in Scotland (for the filming of the hotboy interviews, as it happens) I went to Boots the chemist to stock up on their magic little steel nail files, which are unheard of on the UnHeard Of Island. It turns out they've been withdrawn from sale too! It seems a teenage girl used one to stab another girl quite seriously, and as a result we all have to go file our nails with those sandpaper sticks or a rough stone.
The west should forget about bombing the middle east back to the stone age. Thanks to the lawyers we're heading there ourselves.
Ra Bliss Blog has started a policy of bulk deletion of people's comments. As a result, I'll be reproducing my Bliss Blog comments here, for posterity. Starting with today's comment at Ra Murrayfield :
"Accidentally" deleted? Who's going to believe that. I can't remember what my own wise words were about, but I probably overstepped the mark. Give us a clue, can you?
Last time I was at Murrayfield for an international rugby match, The polis weren't a disgrace but I was. I should have ended up in jail. I was about 15, and it was November, around Guy Fawkes time. Drunk on Crawfords Three Star, I decided it would be funny to throw lighted bangers forward into the crowd. Fortunately, after I had done a few, a guy behind me offered to take my teeth out if I continued.
Do I need to take a backup of this comment in case you remove it? Maybe you could publish a set of guidelines. That would help.
I remember now, I had offered you some free advice on Americanisms. Probably not a tactful thing to do to a writer. But I was only helping!
Late afternoon. My sanity levels, never that high at the best of times, seem to have gone into free fall this week, since the painkiller incident. I've got multiple blog personality syndrome, plus I keep spewing out comments everywhere, and there's no time to read any comments I might be receiving here. Does one know if one's totally losing it? Is it like B.O. and nobody tells you? Tomorrow is HNT day, maybe that will trigger a return to normality.
Lee Ann said...
I am glad you reproduced the Ra Bliss blog comments.
Sleepy...going to bed...nitey nite Rob!
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Zeig! Can't follow this as to what is going on. What is going on then? Are you back to chewing the carpets like in the old days? Can you perform as a kamamudra if you've had hip replacements. I don't see why not! It's illusory anyway, intit? So I'll try to find her, but I fear my spiritual development has a bit to go. Do you think it's possible just to know? It would help if it was. Hotboy
~
Hotboy said...
By the way, this story about Murrayfield is an awful story. What are the evil bourgeois coming to when they behave like that. Chucking bangers into the crowd. I always knew us Kafflics were far superior. Hotboy.p.s. why did you want to drink at fifteen? I don't drink at all, of course.
~
23 May 2006 at 14:29
new movie features unheard of islands
The UnHeard Of Islands are abuzz with the news that we actually feature in this new blockbuster movie about cults and religious secrets.
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! What's the world coming to? That link doesn't link. After all that German meticulousness. Can't believe it! Dearie me. It doesn't help at all! Hotboy
~
keda said...
quite. but the site hasn't been updated since april 25th. its bonkers anyway. mad old women on sleds n fuffy clouds. i wouldn't be suprised if they were into the occult.
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Zeig! Very amusing link! So vee have zee jokes now, I see!Nyaponika Thera and Anagorika Govinda were big Gerries in the juju, of course! As was Goebbels, but that was a different juju! So it doesn't help. Hotboy
~
22 May 2006 at 08:21
virtual listening
Basically, there are 2 types of people: those who divide people into 2 types, and those who don't.
I'll start again. There are 2 types of people: those who really know how to listen to other people. And those who don't.
It's amazing how many people don't know how to listen, they're too busy jumping down your throat in search of springboards for their own pet themes. Many of them just can't bear to drag their attention away from themselves. Talking to these people is a waste of time, so this blog recommends you avoid them, especially if you actually enjoy your own company.
Long ago in Scotland, I was very much involved in a counselling network, about 20 trained counsellors who used 2-way counselling as a tool for personal development and skill development, and a lot more besides (ah, the stories I could tell, and probably will). And there's been spin-off from that time - one of the things I think offer my students now is my ability to listen to them individually, and hear the whole person, not just the words. And in what I laughingly call my personal life, I choose to spend time with people who are good listeners, like me.
But to get back to what I wanted to say. The comments I received at the weekend were very kind, but more importantly the commenters showed they had given their full attention to what I wrote. These
Even my dear old friend hotboy is a great listener, with a terrific memory for embarrassing details you have told him decades ago. Of course, he doesn't do empathy, but he can't help that: he used to be a boxer, and battering someone else in public before they batter you is not the best training ground for empathy.
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Zeig! Conversation is all about imperialism. You gather with others of the species, take drugs, and fight for the space. I do understand about the grope therapy. That kind of toilet training doesn't help anyone. Hotboy. p.s. Boxing is totally empathetic as you gain experience. You know what it's like to lose. You know what it's like to win. You know how mad it is. Boxing is maturing. It is character building. Don't scoff! It is. It just is. Boxing rings are hard places to be in. Of course, there's also the cheap thrills. The dementia is a bonus. I don't think people have advertised dementia properly. Hotboy.
~
said...
Adolf! Zeig! Conversation is all about imperialism. You gather with others of the species, take drugs, and fight for the space. I do understand about the grope therapy. That kind of toilet training doesn't help anyone. Hotboy. p.s. Boxing is totally empathetic as you gain experience. You know what it's like to lose. You know what it's like to win. You know how mad it is. Boxing is maturing. It is character building. Don't scoff! It is. It just is. Boxing rings are hard places to be in. Of course, there's also the cheap thrills. The dementia is a bonus. I don't think people have advertised dementia properly. Hotboy.
~
onan the bavarian said...
HB - that kind of conversation is no good for sensitive souls who need to have a good cry.
I was certainly not scoffing at boxing. I wouldn't go near a ring, though I did once enjoy impromptu playground fisticuffs at primary school. Loved it. I have chosen other avenues of self-development, but I wouldn't decry boxing. I just have this fatal flaw, what I believe you prizefighters call a glass jaw. Glass goolies as well. Glass everything in fact.
But I would still maintain that empathy in the ring is not going to help you. Surely you would save that for after the match, when you can telll him you do empathise with his bruised face?
Does that help?
PS - if you think I need to learn what it's like to lose, maybe the dementia's kicking in. No wonder my mother has the hots for you.
~
Lee Ann said...
Rob, you are awesome. Thank you for the kind words. I think I would be great friends with you, hotboy and mmiii if we lived close.
I can imagine you are one of those teachers that everyone wants to have.
I did not know Hotboy was a boxer!
Now, he meditates! Wow, almost opposite ends of the spectrum.
~xo
~
keda said...
probably the state of being knocked unconcious is pretty similar to being in a meditative state no?
yes rob you are pretty super dooper. thanks for the kind words. its so nice to listen round here though. nice and calming and positive i always find.
~
20 May 2006 at 07:40
the letter thing
As I understand it, it's not a word-association test, so it's not one of these "write down the first ten things that come into your mind" things.
Lee Ann gave me the letter L. This is the letter that I had already imagined she would give me, so I don't know who read whose mind.
- Leather. Despite being Scots and "careful with money", I never stoop to wearing cheap synthetic shoes. As a result, my feet are the best-smelling part of me.
- Lactobacillus. The beneficial wee microbes in yoghurt. They get into your gut and help reduce flatulence, in my case from a roar to a whine. Next time you're on a crowded bus, just take a moment to thank the bacteria.
- Lesbian. Like most males, obviously I'd like to be a lesbian for a while, so I could play with 2 women's bits at the same time. Nothing wrong with that.
- Limits and limitations. Learning to think and act within my own and other people's limitations has made life a lot easier.
- Loving. Used to take me by surprise in occasional intense unpredictable bursts, nowadays it's more sustained and diverse. It's nice when you can sit back and observe it operating in your life, rather than being at its mercy.
- Lao Tzu. The sixth century B.C. philosopher Lao Tzu began the philosophy of Taoism. He taught that all straining, all striving are not only vain but counterproductive. One should endeavor to do nothing (wu-wei). Everything will find its own balance anyway, whether or not you try to influence the outcome.
- Left-handed mouse. I cured my RSI by reversing my mouse hand. Of course that will only continue to work until I develop left-handed RSI. Everything balances up (see above).
- Led Zeppelin. I have posted about this again and again. How many more times?
- Long legs (and a short bod). A killer combination. My beloved partner has it.
- Life. Going pretty well at the moment. Health, brewing, blogging, dog, home life, and the relationship with my partner - all levels are right off the scale.
I've found out that if you sign up to join a tribe at tribe.net, one of the many things you can do there is automatically republish your blog, and maybe pull in some new people. That could help hotboy to get new readers and agents for his books.
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! Thanks for the tribe tip, but doing that would mean doing something, and I've already got something to do which I'm not going to do. That Lao Tzu has a lot to answer for! Hotboy p.s It says on the wall in front of me: "Those who justify themselves do not convince." Lao Tzu. Whatever could that mean?
~
Lee Ann said...
Rob, well done! Leather, absolutely! That is one thing I have learned as well...always buy good shoes. I like yogurt, but I was not aware that it had that ability! My boyfriend says that too....that if he were a girl he would be a lesbian. I agree with you on limits and loving. I love how everything balances in the end. Good thinking with the mouse. Led Zeppelin is awesome. I have never regretted having long legs. I am glad life is going good for you, I really am!
~xo
Oh, I have on occasion been known to read minds! ;)
~
keda said...
rob brilliant!!!
what great words and meanings.
loved it. i know most men would like to watch lesbians but be one!! thats great.
limitations loving and life are wonderful.
and long legs. lee ann, do any of us!?
wonderful.
ooh go on give us a letter.... though it could take a while to get around to it, and i could never match these lovely answers!
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! I come upon this on a Saturday night, and suddenly it's all aoout lesbians.Obviously, I'm a lesbian as well. Gee, I was in Lesbos once on my holidays. You should go there. Actually, my best holiday ever. Lesbians aren't scarey. Lesbians are cool. Everybody's cool. I used to be a lesbian myself until I heard about the anthroposifists. Then I really found myself. It's getting personal. This is bound to help! Hotboy
~
onan the bavarian said...
Lee Ann and Keda, thanks for your ultra-kind comments. Hotboy, thanks for your comments. I have finished the hotboy video, now I understand everything.
Keda, I chose a letter for you, by sticking a pin into the page of a book. It's "s".
Naturally it's up to you if/when you get round to doing the ten-word list. It took me a couple of weeks to get around to it, and even then I only managed 9. Meantime, I've now thought of plenty more.
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! Okay then, but ten things about what? Just ten things. Hotboy.
p.s. I was at this sex party the other night and contortionists were everywhere. I was spectating, as you do. How amazed was I when who siddled up to me but your mother! I'm on the hormones, she said. Are you flirting with me, I said. How she laughed!Hotboy again.
~
onan the bavarian said...
HB - here's a letter for you - M.
Re your question - it says
"including an explanation of what the word means to you and why."
~
onan the bavarian said...
HB - If I was still paranoid like in the good old days, I'd say "what do you mean by suggesting I'm trying to justify myself?"
This truly is progress.
~
zomba said...
I say!
I'll play as long as I get the letter 'Z'. Is that possible?
MM III
~
18 May 2006 at 21:38
celebrating one year of HNT subversion
After I posted this last year, I went to look at other people's HNTs, and that was when I realised that HNT was supposed to be about part-naked, tasteful pictures, but by then it was too late. After that, I had nowhere left to go really, except to try and subvert the genre.
Last week I posted another fruity HNT video. I had planned a Scots-accented video for this week, but I haven't had time yet to add the subtitles, so I'm moving it to next week.
Instead, here's a last minute substitute, a photo I found today at this site. I don't think it's been photoshopped. Can you work out how it was done?
If you missed previous HNTs, you can access all the old half baked thursday posts here.
Sources acknowledged.
Wenchy said...
~
lime said...
LOL, we all make mistakes. i've always enjoyed your pics and vids. when's the next dance lesson? lol happy HNT!
~
Sexy Duet said...
Love the second pic, too funny!! The first one is pretty good too. Happy HNT
~
keda said...
fabulous. and fun for the whole family! the lets loved both pics!
and we love your blog! not just as a stepping stone.... the vieos and pictures re an inspiaation our cut n paste kiddy aftrenoon arttwork therapy sessions!
~
said...
Hee! I went all-out on my first HNT pic, too. And I LIKE it that way. Great pics! HHNT!
~
The Middle Child said...
Happy HNT! Pretty cool pic. Of course we know how it was done, there are two people in the sand...
~
Suze said...
You are so creative. I have been trying to remove those plasters but they wont come off.
Happy Anniversary HNT sweetie ;)
~
BKS said...
Heres hoping that foot at the top is not about to kickoff. :)) Very creative
HHNT
BKS
~
Leesa said...
~
AndyT13 said...
~
Sassy said...
~
betchacantguesswho said...
Anything with a beach theme is A-OK with me. And here we have 2 of them. Loved it. Happy HNT!!
~
said...
Your pics are the best!!! I'm going to be studying that second one all day to figure out how to do it!
Happy HNT`aversary... Can't believe it's been a year already!
~
Michelle said...
LOL Those are great!!!
HHNT :)
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! Got to the crime scene a little late, but it's elementary, dear Watson. The boy in the shadow adjusting his pantaclava is a dead giveaway. Further up the beach some joe has chopped his willie off and replaced it with a bandaid.Who knows how many drugs you'd have to take to play the ukelele after that. Sets the scene. Down the beach a little the boy who showed up for the sex party had his head chopped off.Well, that happens sometimes. Here comes the severed leg from the top. Ooops! Missed all the fun again. Hope this helps.Hotboy
~
lecram sinun said...
LOL! Those are wonderful! Cheers and Happy HNT Anniversary!
~
Lee Ann said...
Rob, you have done an excellent job! I just have one question....Does it hurt when you take your head off?
Love ya,
Happy HNT Anniversary!
~
Lelly said...
I loved that pic of you first time around, and it still makes me chuckle! HHNT anniversary you sweet nutcase you!
~
AndyT13 said...
Thanks for the nice comment about my HNT this week. Feel more than free to link to me, though I'd prefer you link to the post rather than just the picture. I'm trying to sell that CD so any traffic that passes that link will (I hope) help me out. Thank brother!
~
onan the bavarian said...
Andy - okay. Thanks.
Lell - thanks, sometimes I think you're the only one who's got my measure.
~
14 May 2006 at 09:58
the mcsporran
Anyway, he has kindly dedicated a post to me. It concerns football, a sport until recently unknown on these islands. By a fluke, this year the UnHeard Of Islands team qualified for the World Cup, so suddenly everyone here's an expert on the sport. In Germany next month they'll emulate Scotland by getting kicked out in the first round.
Vive La France!
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! Congratulations on getting a post dedicated to you. Does it exist independently or is it part of a fence? The dog will find it a help! Hotboy
~
onan the bavarian said...
Thanks, Extra. I've waited about a year for some positive comment on the template. And congrats on Liverpool winning the FA Cup. I used to watch Brookside, does that help?
HB - I think Extra was assuming, quite astutely, that because you're a Hibs supporter, I must be a Hearts man. But as you may know, I'll never be more than a pants man. Of course none of this will make any sense to the millions of silent U.S. readers.
~
said...
i like how the comments work, this is actually the first time i've had firefox in a while
if the team wins, will they have to rename the island? everyone will have heard of it.
~
onan the bavarian said...
Ray Man! Good to hear from you, I thought you might have drowned at sea.
Good point, I hadn't thought of that, there would be a constitutional crisis over renaming the country.
Fortunately, there's no chance of them winning, I'll give you any odds you like.
~
keda said...
bugger i want firefox....
i love your template as is on safari.
congrats on the post on mcsporran. from now on i guess we should all comment oh his blog here... i promise i want him to live! he's ace*
~
almax said...
Rob
I can't believe that most of the visitors to my blog now come via your blog - thanks for directing your readers my way. I am astonished by the interest.
I can 'invite' people to join my blog by getting Blogger to send an e-mail invitation. This will enable the making of comments on my blog. I have sent one to keda because I can see her e-mail address -if anyone else wants to join can they leave their e-mail address here.
~
onan the bavarian said...
Alastair, I too am astonished, considering nobody much is interested in my blog. Except as a stepping stone to yours.
~
11 May 2006 at 08:25
HNT dance class
So, following the surprising reaction to my first two strawberry films (Strawberry Man and The Death of Strawberry Man) I have branched out into educational videos.
THIS WEEK'S HNT is a first lesson in how to get a partner. If you're averse to nudity, I should warn you that the demonstration involves 4 couples without clothing, but the video is perfectly SFW (suitable for work).
Or for the broadband-challenged, here are some stills from the film:
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! Shame I don't know how to work the video. So is there four naked couples and one severed leg? I was never any good at these sex parties. I always end up in the kitchen with the severed leg! That doesn't help. Hotboy p.s. You could sell the leg on ebay as a companion for some lonely dog. Or send it to me and I can spice up the cannibal soup. I think I need to attract the psychopaths and not the homeopaths.
~
Wenchy said...
~
Lelly said...
Rob/Alec??? Love the vid, can't wait for the next lesson! Also love you and your partners' accents (I am such a sucker for Scortish accents)...I thought you were American for some reason!
Hotboy's comment is hilarious! HHNT!
~
lime said...
what a stitch! i can't wait for the next lesson! HHNT
~
Suze said...
LMAO, can I join in if I bring a banana? I eagerly await part two. Love those Scottish accents.
Happy HNT sweetie ;)
~
The Middle Child said...
~
Leesa said...
I couldn't get it to play :( HHNT anyway!!
~
said...
Hey. I appreciate you stopping by. I use the Mr. Beer method of brewing but am not afraid to step off the beaten path. We live in bum-effed Egypt and don't have a brewer supply store here. The Carribean Lime was light and refreshing and just spectacular. Beers to you and HHNT.
TG
~
said...
I am broadband challenged :( I couldn't play it. I'm not quite sure what to make of the man with all the apples ??? could be interesting :)
~B
~
S said...
I will practice the hand pose until next week! LOL HHNT
~
onan the bavarian said...
Hotboy that was very good, a five-laugh commment. If only you could do the same thing at your blog, you could drop all the bliss stuff once and for all.
PS try and get broadband before next week's HNT video, which will feature yourself.
~
Melissa said...
lol @ hotboy and loved the video HNT!!
ooooo the nudity!
Happy HNT!
~
T - Another Geek Girl said...
LOL at hotboy.
I wonder what would happen if they start eating before the dancing begins?
HHNT!
~
Lee Ann said...
Great photos and fantastic video. I love the accents!
Very cute!
Happy HNT!
~
zomba said...
I say,
Its obvious from that video that the North Beach, UnHeard Island accent is quite different from the Shag Island, Unheard Island accent.
Anyway, on a completely different topic, I thought you might enjoy this humorous website which is for dog lovers.
MM III
~
onan the bavarian said...
Menzies, welcome back. I assumed you were off on your secret world tour.
The dance lesson accent is actually not mine. I was behind the camera.
Excellent dog site.
~
10 May 2006 at 07:03
the great demon drink
First thing this morning I made a cup of herb tea, but then I cracked, and brewed up a cup of real strong black tea with milk. With the first sip, every cell in my body jumped for joy and shouted "Here we go!"
And it was a great walk, with the occasional break into skipping, or running up steps in the rock when the African MP3s came on the headphones. What a great drug is tea!
Kids, if you're reading this, forget designer hallucinogenics and narcotics, this is the real thing, the thinking person's high. Live life at double speed, with no after-effects, only benefits. Hang on, that can't be right. Everything balances up, so there has to be a down side. But what is it? I can't imagine.
The chap who writes alastair's heart monitor has been in contact, to explain why he doesn't allow comments.
So if you're reading this Alastair, here's the comment I would have left at your aintree iron post:
As a kid hearing that song, I wondered what the Aintree Iron was. I assumed it might be the name of a horse race at Aintree, like the Aintree Grand National. Google reveals a host of interpretations.
Dismayed to hear you had some abusive comments. As if major surgery wasn't enough to be getting on with. All the best, robmcj.
PS - Apologies for suggesting your name wasn't real. Some of mine aren't, you see.
But now it's time to get back to work. I've got Lee Ann's meme to finish, and there's another fruit-based video I need to upload to Google Video, so they have time to approve it before tomorrow's HNT.
PET HATE OF THE DAY: People who put their pistachio shells back in with the pistachios.
DOG-WALKING MUSIC FOR THE DAY: Anything by the late great Fela Kuti, who was Nigeria's own Duke Ellington/James Brown/Miles Davis and political thorn in the side of Nigerian governments all his life. He had about 28 wives, each more stunning than the next.
I saw him play in Toronto, and it's the only concert I have ever had to walk out of after the first couple of hours, because the music was too unrelentingly good. Why couldn't he have thrown in the occasional boring tune? Everything should balance up.
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! I found out what an MP3 player was a couple of weeks ago. They're far too small. Also, these memory stick things! I blame all this nonsense on Star Trek! Imagine putting milk in your tea! What a wimp! I've just had a cup of Tetley's straight, no milk, no sugar. How about injecting some? That's bound to help! Hotboy
p.s. What an idiot that boy is, with his 28 wives! The queue for the bog in the morning must be something else!
~
onan the bavarian said...
~
07 May 2006 at 13:18
monitoring stats
Looking at my stats, I see that someone from Glasgow has followed a link from a keda post (thanks keda) to my place, and he/she landed on my pantaclava page, then spent nearly an hour reading my archives. Statcounter lists exactly which pages they read. Who says nobody ever reads archives?
On the subject of Scotland, I enjoyed reading alastair's heart monitor. What a good blog! Variety. Plenty of pics. And, it's written by a Scots guy who's recovering in hospital from heart surgery. And he's younger than me. Yippee!
It's not schadenfreude (meaning: : (German) delight in another person's misfortune), but there is some reassurance in realising I'm old enough for a dodgy heart yet my heart's in great shape. That makes up for getting cancer at age 30, when I was really far too young for cancer. Everything balances up in the end. What a fortunate creature I am!
How do I know he's younger than me? A picture on his site shows he got his school prize in 1971, by which time I was already at university, falling in with bad company.
But I think he must have photoshopped a joke name into the image. If his name's really McSporran, then mine's McClochendichter.
keda said...
yay great blog! loved all his football stuff! but as we cant comment no way to let him know.
thanks for the tip babe.
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Zeig! Looking at the stats from Blogpatrol was the most useless, time wasting and enjoyable thing I did. Now it won't accept my ID, and it's the automatic one it shows. Haven't had the same fun with StatsCounter, but I get more hits with that. Their page loads, unique visitors, etc don't add up. Since I stopped believing in things, of course I stopped understanding them. How can someone visit for zero seconds? I had your mother up cutting the grass on the allotment paths today. She's really looking forward to the trip to Italy. She might become a catholic, she says, because of the Nazi Papa getting in. It's not going to help, is it? Hotboy
~
onan the bavarian said...
keda - yes, there's not even an email so maybe he doesn't care about feedback? What a waste!
HB - yes, like you I stopped trying to reconcile the various stats. IT has progressed to the stage where computers can't even add up. Thanks for all the work you're putting in on the old dear.
~
Lee Ann said...
I like that you always say that everything balances out in the end.
I think of you often wondering how you are with the cancer. I hope things are very well for you.
Is that your name, McSporran or McClochendichter?
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! Is it really possible to change the name on that photie? If so, it's a big help. How can anyone believe in anything after that? Hotboy
~
almax said...
Thankyou for the kind comments about my blog.
The reason that it's closed to comments is that in the beginning I got a few abusive comments, including one death threat !!
I couldn't handle that since the reason for the blog is just as some therapy to help me get over the heart surgery. Obviously it's just a laugh for me and my pals.
My name is correctly shown on the photo you used !!!!
Have a look at
http://blogsearch.google.com/blogsearch?hl=en&q=mcsporran&btnG=Search+Blogs
there are hundreds of us !!
So, how do I address you - robmcj or McClochendichter?
Best wishes
alastair
~
03 May 2006 at 21:44
aracHNTophobia
This picture makes up for all the HNTs where I'm just wearing a bunch of bananas. Averaged out over time, I'm exactly half-nekkid. Everything balances up.
If you missed previous HNTs, you can access all my old half baked thursday posts here.
Suze said...
Make sure you dont get any in your pants.
Happy HNT sweetie ;)
~
lime said...
i don't blame you one bit for covering up like that. big ick. HHNT
~
Lee Ann said...
I would be wearing all of that protective clothing too! I love this picture!
You are right, everything balances out!
Happy HNT Rob!
~
said...
Pantaclava! Ha! Awesome! Not so awesome? Spiders. *shiver* HHNT!
~
Leesa said...
~
S said...
Frightening the stuff that lives under our house! I just had to have an exterminator pull out three dead rats...oh what a stench!
Makes for a very fun HNT though~ THanks for the spider lore! HHNT
~
Lil Bit said...
LMAO! Too cute.
You are 1 brave soul to be under there to begin with! I was workin' in the yard yesterday, went to pick up a pile of brush and a huuuuuuuuuge brown spider jumped out of it and ONTO ME!
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeks!
LOL. I sooo screamed like a girl!
HHNT!
~
Avery's mom said...
you look scary like a burgler breaking into a house . watch out for creepy crawlies lol
Happy HNT
~
zomba said...
I say!
Good job none of the spiders were poisonous. Not so many spiders in this part of the world, but many snakes.
Once had a green mamba in the back garden. Doviko took control immediately - got the dogs, and myself well out of the way, and then set to, with a slasher.
Spitting cobras, too. Nasty creatures. Here is a fascinating video of someone else's battle with one, not far away.
MM III
MM III
~
Melissa said...
Good Lord!!!
I squealed when I saw those pictures in the post below!!!!!!!!!!
**Shudder**
spiders... blech!
We have black widows under our house. It's like the native spider in this region and for some reason.. they really really like our place.
Cute pic of you
btw thats a riot!
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! Fabulous photie! Bob Hoskins in Brazil! But I cannot work out the sexual perversion. Is the wrap-around clothing to stop you catching anything? Why crawl around under your house? That would never occur to me. Even if I had a house. Have you noticed there are no black people? Do you have any? Where have they all gone? I think I'm black from here on in. Black and Hotboy.
~
Chickie said...
After reading the previous post, I see why you needed to be so bundled up! Happy HNT!
~
said...
I would definately have more than that on if I had spiders like that under my house. On second thought I wouldn't be crawling under the house :) Makes me really happy for once that we live on a slab!!
Happy HNT and thanks for your sweet comment!
~B
~
zomba said...
I say!
If you don't understand cricket, here's a video of President Bush attempting to play in Pakistan. Now then - is he playing with a stright bat?
MM III
~
Lelly said...
Actually, that's quite a good look! Belated HHNT, Rob!
~
at 10:26
webs and knots
I've just resurfaced from under the house, where I was crawling about doing the annual check for termites. There were lots of spiders, none of them poisonous.
Thank goodness all the black shiny spiders that moved in under my bedroom a few years ago seem to have cleared out now. They were poisonous. Not deadly, but who would want to verify that? They lived in burrows, and in the mating season they used to make horrible cracking sounds when they were fighting. I could hear them through the floorboards, I think they must have been crunching each other's antlers or something.
This is one of the spiders I used to have:
The spider in the second picture looks less butch but it's deadly. It's a funnel-web spider. If you find one under your bedroom, clear out, move house if necessary.
The huntsman spider, seen below, is even bigger and hairier. This is the one that bit me in the middle of the night, when I lived in Australia. It's harmless, but how was I to know that?
Yesterday, Blogger seemed to be accepting comments but not posts. I'm not sure if this was a global phenomenon, or if I had simply tied my PC in knots by logging on as several different bloggers at once. At one point, I thought I was commenting as myself but the comment ended up being by someone called Alec McClochendichter.
There's a wedding I have to go to this Saturday. Some people look forward to weddings. Not me. Even though they are lovely people and it's a society wedding so we're going to be mixing with the cream of the UnHeard Of showbiz world, it's going to be hard work as far as I'm concerned. What to wear? What present to buy? How to disguise my MP3 headphones so nobody notices I'm tuning out? A pantaclava would cover it, but I don't have a formal one. Some people tune out by rolling their eyes up into their head. That would be useful.
Okay, because I like the couple I'll probably manage to enjoy the actual vows. But if you ask me they should start the honeymoon right after the ceremony, and the guests could go off and watch a nice video, maybe the David Attenborough spider documentary.
Sources acknowledged.
Lee Ann said...
Oh, the spiders look scary! I can't stand them, I would have freaked out.
I don't like weddings too much either. I just can't help it. Oh well. I hope it turns out fun for you.
Oh yes, I am glad you are still alive!
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! One of the big ones used to make a new web outside our door in Perth every night. Fab! Also, the weddding is your big chance to clean up. There's bound to be a publisher there. Just grab him and shake him till the money falls out. That would help. Hotboy
~
keda said...
you are evil. i'll be itching all night now.
pooh i'm off to have a .... oh no what if there's a spider in the bath?!
damn you robalecattenbroughclavaman!
i am secretly glad you are still alive too though!
~
Spinning Girl said...
I have the complete heebie jeebies from those pictures.
AND they move.
Ugh.
~
01 May 2006 at 13:17
cultural parallelism
Anyway, a while back I blogged about Spud's brother, Usuff, who has a dark room where he photographs geometric patterns, using a camera and a torch on 2 swinging pendulums.
This was one of the pictures he made.
When I showed this to Cap'n Kev, a connoisseur of all things Middle Eastern, he said "ah reckon them Islamics coulda taught us a thing 'r two."
Meanwhile, after the last post, hotboy quite rightly warned me of the folly of wasting your fluids over age 50. I must remember that when I turn 50. And on further reading of the research, I see that the cancer-protecting effect only applies to activity before age 30. And only solo activity qualifies. Did I put in enough effort at that age? I can't remember. The retention deficit disorder's kicking in again.
Lelly said...
That photo and the device are both really unusual and beautiful...what interesting friends you have, Rob!
~
Hotboy said...
Adolf! Heil! That pendulum thing is a lot of old ... why don't these people get proper jobs? That would help! Hotboy
~
Lee Ann said...
I used to play with a yoyo when I was a child. It was fun.
That picture of the pendulum thing drawing in the sand is soooooo cool. I want one!
~
onan the bavarian said...
Lell - I have a total of 2 friends in the entire southern hemisphere, and I see them a couple of times a year. If I needed friends I could jump on a plane to Glasgow.
HB - what about all the carpetmakers?
Neo, glad you liked it as much as I did.
LA - I'm going to try making one, I'll let you know how I go.
Carse - Hotboy says that's fine but he should retain the fluid.
~
keda said...
well as long as spud is under 30 he's doing a good thing!
and rob darling, i have NO doubt that you put in enough effort. everyone does until they reasch their 30's don't they?
amazing pictures. it must be so beautiful to watch.
~
onan the bavarian said...
Damn! The beautiful gizmo picture I linked to has been taken down. Sorry.
~
onan the bavarian said...
Found some new pics and linked them in.
~